An interesting question. A question of prosperity.
At a very low level, I want to be happy.
Happiness doesn’t come from doing whatever it is that comes to mind (an immature version of “whatever I want”).
I want to have purpose. A driving force, a reason to endure trial and hardship.
I want to be passionate about something. To care so much that any obstacle is merely in the way and is surmountable.
I’ve mentioned briefly that the two times I’ve broken down are when I’ve seen immense poverty and the things I’ve been engaged with at the time (usually jobs) have been completely unable to help.
I believe the hopelessness got to me. And not that poverty is a hopeless plight and it’s impossible to exit. But more that so few people were willing to choose to exit.
So what do I want?
I want to care again and not have that caring eat me alive from the inside.
I want to have a life where I can be physically fit, spiritually balanced, emotionally resilient, and (maybe even) socially adjusted.
I want to have reason to live, love, learn, breathe, and serve.
How do I return to caring?
🤷♂️