As I’m getting back on track and trying to make sure I can do the things I want to do, I realize one of the skills I currently lack is the ability to focus.
I currently lack the ability to give attention to the thing that might be of most value to me, and instead focus on the thing that is most entertaining.
Writing this entry right now is an excellent case in point. Were I able to focus, I’d probably pay attention in priesthood at church or I would focus on writing things I’m grateful for on a paper I brought to church with me.
Instead I’m reflecting on my inability to focus on the most meaningful and am playing with my phone. (There’s some argument that this has some benefit, but it’s likely not the best thing I could be doing.)
Does the inability to focus have to do with a desire to have instant visual feedback? Is the focus on tv shows and phone screens just mean I’ve got an addiction that needs addressing? (If so, what pain am I medicating by using the screens?) is it something else? Or am I simply acting differently from how I used to because the state of the world has changed?
So many questions. Maybe with a little focus I could find the answers.